I will call on the Lord

I will call on the Lord, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies.

2 Samuel 22:4

 

The Lord liveth: and blessed be my rock; and exalted be the God of the rock of my salvation.

2 Samuel 22:47

 

I love it when I find little nuggets. I found this years ago, right around when I had first became a Christian, that these two verses were in the same chapter and they are also the words to a song I sang growing up.

 

 

 

I will call upon the Lord.

 

 

 

What does that mean when you read that?

 

It doesn't say I might, I will think about it, I will have to see if I have time at the end of the day...

 

 

 

No, it says,

I will.

 

 

As a stay at home mom of three, I have little actual alone time. Recently, Jack came in my room and saw me praying by my bed for a moment and I was crying. I honestly feel like that is a good thing for a child to see. I want him to know his mom asks God for forgiveness and that I call on His name. I need God every single moment. I'm assuming you do too!

 

 

 

At my last 9-5 job, well, my hours were actually 8-6, the boss, who I am sure wouldn't mind me mentioning his name, Lonnie Bosley, allowed his employees who wanted to, to meet and pray before we started our day. I watched God bless his business because he called on the Lord. I loved listening to some of those shop guys pray! Straight from the heart.

 

 

 

I have written about this countless times I feel like, but when our only son, Jack, went through a very scary time of seizures and was delayed on several things, we had to see a neurologist who insisted he had many signs of cerebral palsy. On a brain test it showed a "slowing." He called me at nearly midnight to say this was either a tumor or a bleed on his little nine month old brain. Terrified, we scheduled the MRI. The church prayed and family fasted and we found out how truly loved Jack was. The day came for the MRI. They put him to sleep and sent him in the tube. The radiologist said "I don't even know what we are looking for, all I see is a completely healthy looking brain."
That following day was his last seizure EVER. And within a couple months he had totally caught up. God saved his life during my pregnancy with him as well. It was just as big of a miracle. God has amazing plans for my son, Jack Gannon.

 

 

 

As newly weds we had a good chunk to pay in property taxes for the first time. It took us down to less than $20 in our account. Grant payed it before we went into a revival church service. The Pastor, Adrian Condent, announced that the Lord put "Grant and Hannah on his heart," and he asked that they would all take up a special offering just for us! This was a first! The total was a few dollars more than what we just paid out in taxes a couple hours prior.

 

 

 

Depression. I had it for six months. I admitted what it was last January. My family prayed over me. I felt a warming sensation come in my chest and travel all the way down my body and out my feet. It LEFT and has NEVER returned.

 

 

 

Who is worthy to be praised.

 

 

 

I feel so unworthy even trying to explain how worthy He is.

I was at my lowest the day I was saved. I was on my way to a real, burning hell.

Jesus took on every sin you've ever committed when He was crucified.

Think about that.

Think for just a few seconds about your sins.

Those that nobody else knows about. Those that might ruin your good girl/boy reputation. Those that would maybe ruin some relationships you have.

God died for you even when He knew perhaps you would never accept His love. That is true love. That is real. That is something you won't find in a movie or in a friendship. It is unthinkable.

God is worthy of your praise. He is worthy of your worship.

 

 

He made me worthy. Not by anything I did or didn't do, but when I accepted Him and I saw my sin for what it really was, He made me into a new creation. I'm not the same Hannah anymore.

 

 

I praise the Lord for that.

 

 

So shall I be saved from mine enemies.

 

 

When you call on Him and you recognize He is worthy, He will save you.
 

God will protect you in times that your health insurance won't.
 

His Hand will protect you when your gun or nations army won't.
 

His Grace and Mercy will protect you when the devil says you've done way too much wrong!
 

His Love will protect you from feeling rejected by your parent when they walked out on you.
 

His Forgiveness will protect you from holding a grudge.
 

His Joy will protect you from staying in depression any longer.
 

His Peace will give you protection from bitterness and resentment.
 

He will save you from your enemies! BLESS THE LORD. I feel that as I write that!

 

 

 

The Lord liveth.

 

 

 

He was crucified and He did die. That's a fact.

 

 

But, just as much as that is true, so is the fact that He rose from the dead and He is ALIVE.

 

 

He lives!

 

 

Christ Jesus lives today, He walks with me and talks with me...

 

 

That is how I know He lives!

 

 

Someone asked me years ago how I could be so certain that there is a God. They were basically a genius so I was slightly nervous but the Lord filled my mouth. I told them nobody could change my desires and my heart other than God. And He did that in an instant. That is how I know He is REAL.

 

 

When others see me, I want them to see Him.

 

 

If you are a Christian, that should be your thought in every single situation.

 

 

When I do this, say that, react to this... will others see JESUS? Or will they see a flesh filled man or woman only caring for their own self.

 

 

God forgave me and so it is my reasonable service to forgive others! You can do it too through the Power of the Blood!

 

 

How else will the world know we are different? How else will the world be drawn to God?

 They must see it in our actions and reactions! They must see Him!



 

And blessed be my Rock.

 

 

He is not sand. He is not mud. He is not pebbles on a beach. He is not a sinkhole.

 

 

He is your Rock.

 

 

Stand on Him. When everything else fails you, He will not.

 

 

When your marriage seems to be falling apart, He will give you and your mate a solid place to stand.

 

 

When your child is sick, He will give you a dry, safe spot to rest.

 

 

When your dreams have fallen apart, He will lift your head and remind you that nothing has fallen apart... but everything is falling into place.



 

And exalted be the God of the rock of my salvation.



 

Exalted. Lifted up. Worshipped.

 

Praise the God who IS the rock of your salvation!

 

Being a Christian isn't meant to be easy. It's worth it though. It'll be worth it when you stand before God Almighty and He speaks those words to you, that you have been FAITHFUL to Him. The only way to stay faithful and to remain in communion with Him is staying on that Rock. Sure, life may happen sometimes and you may find that the Rock is a few feet, or maybe miles away, but that is and never was God's fault. You are the one who moves away from Him. You are the one who wants to sew your wild oats and to be your own individual and forget the One who will offer you peace, forgiveness and redemption.

 

 

 

It isn't too late to come back to the Rock. After you breath your last breathe though- it is. And it says in the Bible life is a vapor. I have seen babies go to Heaven. I watched Grant's 92 year old grandmother go to Heaven. You don't know how much longer you have.

Call on the Lord.


 

He is there, waiting.

Waiting for a relationship with you. Waiting to give you peace and joy. Waiting to put a sweet healing on your life and soul. Waiting to restore all that the devil meant for evil.

 

 

 

 

Now, what are you going to do with that?

 

 

God bless each and every person reading this. I truly do pray you were blessed and have drawn a little closer to the Lord by reading and applying this today.



The Secret Place in the midst of Disapointments and Aches

 

 

 

 

We have had a wild schedule lately. Out of State for a solid three weeks. Finally home for a few days and I'm enjoying sleeping on my own pillow. So, this morning after making the kid's favorite, pancakes, I was listening to some music while I was loading the dishwasher.

 

 

 

As I listened to a song, I teared up. It was a song I had heard on the radio for years and one my cousin, Crosby, has sung for a while. But, the words just kind of settled with me. Do you know what I mean? When you hear the words to a song, and you think "I could have written that..."

 

 

 

 

I found peace as I listened to these words.

 

 

 

 

 

We pray for blessings, we pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
And all the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your word is not enough
And all the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not,
This is not our home
It's not our home

'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near

What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I felt like each line connected to somewhere deep in my soul. In places where even my tried and true friendships wouldn't know of. They sank down and I felt the words. Really felt them. I looked back on my life in the few minutes the song played and I realized I have had a lot of disappointments and aching. Whether you are reading this and you're my tried and true friend, or someone on the other side of the planet... we can relate in that area. You have disappointments. You have aching.

 

 

 

 

Maybe you had hopes and dreams of becoming something certain, and those plans fell through the cracks.

 

 

Your engagement to your high school sweetheart was stopped weeks before the wedding.

 

 

 

Your child was diagnosed with a minor or major illness.

 

 

 

You had to bury your spouse.

 

 

 

You found out your spouse was living a double life.

 

 

 

Your child made some pretty bad choices.

 

 

 

Your friend betrayed you.

 

 

 

Your family rejected you once you became a Christian.

 

 

 

Your health is failing.

 

 

 

You had to experience a miscarriage. Or multiple.

 

 

 

You found out you couldn't have "your own children."

 

 

 

Your boss let you go. No reason.

 

 

 

Your closest friends chose comfort rather than defending you.

 

 

 

 

Your dream home was built. Then, you had to sell it because you were in way over your head.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Disappointments

 

 

 

 

Aching

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why do they happen? I've heard that question more than once. Why do bad things happen to good people? Maybe you've never asked those exact words, but there's a good chance you have asked it in a different form. I know I have. God, why has this had to happen??

 

 

 ----------------

 My writing was interrupted because I got a call from a dear friend who just left a sonogram and they weren't able to find the heartbeat of their sweet little child. I cried and prayed with her. That is an ache. God, comfort my friend...

----------------

 

 

 

 

 

A few years ago I felt betrayal from someone near to me. I asked God why He let this happen.

He showed me that EVERY SINGLE human alive that I will EVER come in contact with, will

let me down. And not only that, I will let THEM down. I think often times we play the victim card when in fact, we are not the victim at all. You think its your parents fault, your siblings fault, your spouses fault, your friends fault, your aunts fault, your uncles fault, your cousins fault, your kids fault, your pastors fault, your best friends' fault...

 

 

Sometimes, it is their fault, but I like to check out my own motives and actions first! I will answer to God for how I treated them. It says in the Bible that if we don't forgive others, God can't forgive us!
I think the hardest person to forgive is the one who doesn't say sorry own up to their wrong.



But...do you know how my relationship started with the Lord?


I said I was sorry.


And He forgave me.


 

 What if that is all that needs to happen with your spouse? What if you need to say you're sorry.


What if you need to tell your kid you're sorry for their childhood.


Tell your friend you're sorry you went MIA during a time they really needed you.


Tell your Pastor you're sorry for not respecting him and his family.


Tell your family member you're sorry you have pushed them away all these years. Own up to it. Be a man or woman. God will bless you for that.


Tell you're child you're sorry you yelled at them.


Tell your spouse you're sorry you haven't been the spiritual leader that God created you to be as the man of the house.


Tell your spouse you're sorry you haven't been a help meet, but rather a hinder meet.



Tell your boss you're sorry you were never on time and never did your job correctly.



Tell that old friend you're sorry for making them feel bad about their appearance.


Tell your doctor you are sorry that you got so upset with him when he told you the bad news.


Tell that person you've held a grudge against that you are sorry.


Go ahead, call them. It will change your life. Just those two words.






I'm sorry.









Tell God you are sorry.






 

 What if all those disappointments and aches are for a reason? I believe they are. I believe at the end of the day, if you are a Child of God, he will turn what Satan and even other people meant for evil and bad and turmoil in your life- God will turn it into good. It may not look that way right now, but He will. You have freewill though, and with that freewill, you have your own choices to make.








You have a choice to say you're sorry.


You have a choice to forgive someone even if they won't say they are sorry.


You have a choice to live in that Secret Place from Psalms 91 day and night.


Sheltered from the storms. Sheltered from the wind. Sheltered from the bullets.


You will be okay. You will. That is something I was told and something I will always tell others.








It'll be okay. You will be okay.






Trust God with your disappointments and aches. He will reveal to you that He is the answer and the refuge You long for.

Place your happiness and worth in Him, not situations, not people, but in the One Who died for you.



The One who meets you in the middle of the night.

The One who wipes your tears.


The One who loves you win you are on the top, and when you're on the bottom.






Find Him in that Secret Place today.



Wounded For Good

But as for you, ye thought evil against me, but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.

Genesis 50:20

 

 

Have you ever been hurt? Betrayed? Rejected? Forgotten?

 

 

Maybe you are tougher than me, but those things are all hurtful, in my opinion. I have felt all of them, intensely over the course of the past year. I have always loved very deeply, therefore, I get hurt very deeply. It's not really a positive quality of mine, at least in my opinion, but nevertheless, it is one. As much as I have tried to become calloused to betrayal, rejection or being forgotten, I still am such a sensitive person. When somebody in my life hurts, I hurt. When a friend of mine is in pain, I can't just pray for them and go about my day. I feel their pain. I carry those burdens.

 

 

I have went through many seasons in my 29 years. I was lost the first 17 years and 4 months of my life. I had no idea what it was to really be a Christian. After being saved, I went through a season of guilt. I felt bad for any little thing I did wrong prior to being saved. Then I went through a season of depression. It lasted around 6 months. I was miraculously delivered from it one year ago. Then, I entered a season of wounds. Yes, you read that correctly. Wounds. I was bitter at first. I'm just being honest. I didn't understand why I would have to be wounded as a Christian. I always sang and loved the song "Through it all." It was my favorite song during the time we went through our miscarriage. I heard it again recently and the words resonated in my soul.

 

 

If I never had a problem, I wouldn't know God could solve them, wouldn't know what faith in His Word could do...

 

 

I went through betrayal in my teenage years, as I'm sure most people do. You think your "best friend" will be your best friend for then next 75 years and then you realize they are human before you guys graduate high school. But, once I became a Christian, I had no idea I would feel betrayal and rejection by other Christians.

 

 

I started reading about Joseph. If somebody was rejected and betrayed, it was him. If someone had a reason to be bitter, it was him. And if someone had a reason to get even, it was him! But, what amazes me to this very moment about Joseph is the fact that he never threw it up in his brothers faces that he was right all along. Instead, in the end, he wept over them. He showed Christ' love to them when he forgave them.

 

 

 

Has someone lied about you? Or perhaps they didn't lie. Maybe they just repeated a matter that was between only the two of you. You wander why they would take a chance on wounding your heart when you have been only true and loyal to them your entire friendship. No, you haven't been perfect, but you stood by their side and you always defended them. You cried with them. You laughed with them. You worshipped together. You prayed together.

I have always kept a thin sheet up between my fingertips and my keyboard, but I feel I can't help anyone unless I am totally transparent.

 I have spoken to God about how I have felt and He's done a mighty work in my life. I am a private person, so I don't like others to know information about me that isn't skin deep, but as I share a little bit of my heart, I pray someone relates and can get some help knowing I'm making it through the fire and so will they. Remember, when something is under heat, impurities will come to the top. 

 Speaking of talking to God, talk to Him. I have grown closer to God in the past year or two because I have made a point to go to HIM first- not my best friends here on earth.

I have been lied about.

 I have had words put in my mouth.

I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that someone did that to me, or the fact that somebody else really believed what they said. Regardless. I was wounded.

 

 

Have you been rejected? And the more you tried, the more you were pushed away?

I can relate.
 

 I felt that because they didn't want or need me in their life, that was a reflection of my worth. Wounded, again. This wound came at the same time as the betrayal wound. So, I had two wounds I was trying to heal and protect, all the while, the enemy was digging their dirty sharp claws deep into my open wounds, getting me while I was down. Pressing their foot hard into my throat. I truly felt I was suffocating some days.

 

 

I have written about how I have been a people pleaser before. I have also said how I have went through a time of feeling insecure, like I was never measuring up in life. The devil has tried just about any tactic possible to torment my mind. The antidote for ALL of these issues I have been through in the past 29 years have all been found in God's Word.

 

 

I don't have some big newfound explanation on how to get over feeling guilty, how to stop people pleasing and trying to have every single persons approval, how to stop feeling down in the dumps, how to lift your spirits when you're betrayed by a friend, rejected by a family member, forgotten or attacked by the devil...

 

 

No, what I have is the best words known to man. God's Word.

 

 

So, here's my testimony of how God got me through and how He still gets me through.

 

 

When I was feeling guilt...

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

When I was being a people pleaser...

There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, that shall stand. Proverbs 19:21

When I was depressed or anxious...

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. John 14:27

When I was feeling betrayed...

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

When I was feeling rejected...

He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. Psalms 147:3

When I am feeling forgotten...

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13&14

 

 

And the one verse that is my screensaver which I am currently trying to memorize which you can apply to any situation in life...

But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive. Genesis 50:20

 

 

If you are God's child, Satan thinks evil against you. That's a no brainer.

I know I have a lot more to learn in life but as I learn, I want to help share what God has done in my life, in hopes that it will encourage and strengthen someone else out there. Perhaps someone I have not and will never meet on this side.

I am truly sorry for every thing and every person who has ever hurt you. I am sorry for every person who never showed up for you. I am sorry for the racism you experienced. I am sorry for the sexual abuse. I am sorry for the verbal abuse. I am sorry they left. I am sorry they let you go. I am sorry they didn’t choose you. I am sorry they forgot you. I am sorry. 

 

Don't wait any longer for an apology. Sometimes- you just won't get the "I'm sorry," you've longed for, so you can move on. But God wants to heal you and allow you to move on even without an apology.

 

 

 

 

I want to genuinely say thank you for reading and I pray you are blessed by something I wrote. Remember that you ARE enough and that you DO matter and that you ARE needed and wanted.

 

 

 

 

Forgive those who have wounded you. To be forgiven by God, we must forgive others.

Give those around you margin for error. Give them allowance to not always be just perfect. Be quick to say you are sorry and to forgive them. Don't remind them of their faults. Don't expect a pat on the back for doing something good. Don't just pray because it's expected of you as a Christian. Pray because that's how you talk to God. That's how you draw closer to the Friend who will never leave or forsake you. Stop living in the past. Step into the future you were made to trail blaze. You were wounded for good. Just like me.

love, Hannah

 

 

I send this out in a group message on my phone to whoever I know likes to read it, so thanks for anyone who does. Several people have told me they want to share what I say on social media or through other avenues, which I welcome any new traffic and readers. :) Someone from Isle of Man was reading last night. WOW. SO cool.

 

 

 

p.s. even though those who hurt me as a teen or as an adult will never read this, I still want to say and want you to know... I forgive you. Whether you ever say you're sorry or not. I forgive you.

I love you. I mean that.



Free of Me

 

 

Free to be me.

 

 

 I loved that song so much when it first came out by Francesca Battistelli. I liked her music even more when one night I got a call on my phone and my brother in law, Gabe, said on the other end, "someone wants to talk to you." Two seconds later this happy girl was talking to me and low and behold it was her! He had waited in line after a concert in California so he could call me back in Kansas so I could talk to her. He's a pretty nice brother in law. :)

 

Well, that song is great, and I love Fran. But today, I'm going to write about being free of me.

 

 

Free of me.

 

 

Say that few times.

 

I have been writing very rarely for several months now. The Lord put in on my heart to not worry so much about trying to get a post up every week or two and to just live my life as a young
wife and mother for now. I will have all sorts of time to write once these kids are raised.

 

 

I will always have this laptop, not small children.

_______________________________



 

What makes you feel complete? What puts you in a good mood or lifts your spirits?

Is it if your kids are well dressed and behaved? Is it if your spouse is treating you good? Or maybe it's as simple as having a good hair day or getting 100 likes on your Facebook post. Maybe it's landing a great job or purchasing a new home.

 

 

Do you base your confidence on how people accept you, approve of you, and like you?

 

 

 First, you must realize that not everyone wants peace.

Not everyone wants to sit in a circle, hold hands and sing Kumbaya. 

Not everyone is meant to be in your life forever.

And not everyone is led by the Spirit, sadly.

 

 

 

 

 I want to drill deep in your heart and soul today some truths.

 

 

 

 

 

Truths I have come to learn through people, through a book I'm reading, through the Bible, and most importantly, through my time in prayer.

 

 

 

 

When you're rejected, you join company with the Savior. I was having a pity party several weeks ago as I felt this way and I thought to myself, who am I to think everyone will accept me? That nobody will ever turn their back on me or just decide they don't have time for our friendship anymore? Jesus was sinless and he was wrongly accused and to this day He is rejected. Who am I to think I should be treated even better than Christ?

 

 

When Jesus died on the Cross, he redeemed rejection. Whether it is from a parent when you were a child, a spouse as an adult, or a friend at any time. He redeemed it.

 

 

Jesus entered into that lonely place, that place of rejection, so it would not have to be the end of our story. Somehow, through rejection, God does a work in us that He would not have done if we would have been included. God will make us more like Him as we are in that place of feeling left out and rejected.

 

 

 

 

 

You may come to a place in your life where you must make a choice. Let's say you're at that point right now. God will ask you to do something that isn't about you, or doesn't feel good, or requires you to suffer. What will you do? Will you chose the easier path? The more comfortable place where you will continue being liked and applauded? Or, will you lay yourself at the feet of Jesus and say, "Lord, I am here, a willing vessel for you to use freely. I am free of me!"

 

 

 

When we can finally look at ourselves and see we are wrong, see we have made life about us, see that we make relationships about us (or the lack of a relationship), see that we make our marriage and even parenting skills about us... we can repent and allow God to mold this clay into something beautiful He can use.

 

 

 

 

What is the secret, you ask?

 

 

Pray.

 

 

 

There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother, and His name is Jesus.

 

 

 

Whether you are saved, backslid or you've yet to front slide... pray.

 

 

You don't need to pray in King James Version for God to hear you.

 

 

Some of my best prayers were ones where I just praised God and worshiped Him.

 

 

Praise Him for all He's done and Worship Him because He is. That is it.

 

 

He is. He is enough. He is enough to set you free. Even if circumstances don't change immediately and maybe those people will never apologize or try to make it right, He is enough for you.

Even if your child is addicted to drugs or in prison or just constantly disrespects you, God is enough for you. How people treat you and how your children (or parents) behave and the decisions they've made are NOT a reflection on you, unless you make it that way.

 

 

 

I am a joy filled Christian because God is enough for me.

 

 

When you make that sentence above the true motto of your life, it takes the pressure off of everyone around you and off of yourself to make you happy.

 

 

 

 

 

This life is to be about one mission.

 

 

To further and to grow God's Kingdom.

 

 

It's real.

 

 

I know I don't have a big fancy blog and smart words, but I write what I do, when I can, because I want to hopefully encourage someone to draw closer to the Lord, or to be saved.

 

 

 

What is your mission in life?

 

 

Is it protecting your self image? Or is it protecting the Image of God?

 

 

 

 

I want to pray over each of you who are reading this right now.

 

 

 

Loving Father,

 

I praise and worship You for who You are. I rebuke Satan right now in the name of Jesus from robbing anyone who is reading this blog from their happiness and joy in life. I believe there are those out there who find their identity only in their successes and failures. Break them free of this bondage! We want to pursue You, and You alone. I ask that each person would be convicted by Your Holy Spirit of anything in their life and heart that is above You. Pride, jealousy, anger, resentment, gossip, I rebuke it all in the POWERFUL NAME OF JESUS CHRIST. We are free because of Your shed Blood and we are called to be like You, so prune our lives, remove anything toxic, whether that is a relationship, a job, a past failure... redeem what You need to be redeemed if it will bring You glory! Keep our hearts right and pure, for that is the only way we can be used by You.

As I pray to You in my personal prayers, Lord, transform my desires so that I can live a life that is pleasing to You.
 

In Jesus name I pray,

 

Amen.

 

 



There are miracles yet to be seen

Well, I sit here in the deer stand on this rather beautiful October evening, and I can't help but to feel so at home. Yes, I'm basically in my parents backyard, but what I mean, is I love to get alone back here because it's just me, some animals and God! Probably how Adam felt... then God made him a help meet. What I found kind of ironic is she was supposed to be helping, but she ended up hindering him pretty fast! But, a miracle was yet to be seen. Her sinning and her husband sinning led the great need for an Ultimate Sacrifice, the Son of God. Jesus Christ.

Sometimes things happen in our life that seem rather ironic... but God is going to work a miracle.

I don't know why I had this random thought, but I'm kind of sick of hearing lately how powerful the devil is and how he is ruining people's lives.

You know what??

I serve a God who is the miracle that you've been waiting on.

He will save you from the pits of hell.

He will hold your hand when your feeling kind of lonely... we ALL have felt that.

Just trust the Lord and rest in HIS promises. He is mightier than any devil or demonic force that is trying to fight against you! He is the WAY Maker!

Let go of anxiety and unforgiveness and hatefulness...

Let God work a miracle in YOU.

That's what He is ALL about.

Deserted and Refreshed

 

 

 

 

So, I'm officially attending my first Bible Study on Tuesday nights.

 

 

I'm loving it.

 

 

 

 

Beth Moore is pretty intense and deep, but I like that.

I'm a words and visualization person.

 

 

 

 

It's an entire study on Second Timothy.

 

 

 

I don't have much time today to go into all the details of what this study is about, but this week had a lesson in it that really hit home with me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter one, verse fifteen says individuals who turned away/deserted Paul.

 

 

 

It wanted me to fill in the blanks of a couple people who had done that in my life.

 

 

That was awkward.

 

 

Not only having to think of a painful time, but also being asked to write their names down.

 

 

 

Feeling deserted by someone hurts, especially when it's someone you invested your own sweat and tears into.

 

 

Have you been left alone by someone who you last expected would leave you? Perhaps it was a parent when you were just a five year old little kid. Maybe it was a spouse who chose their addiction over you. Or, was it a friend? Someone you sat and ate with, someone you made memories with, someone you trusted. Or maybe it was a group of people. We all have our own experiences... let your mind ponder on that tough time for a moment or two.

 

 

 

 

 

Then, a verse later it speaks of an individual who "refreshed" Paul.

 

 

 

Onesiphorus.

 

Yep, that is his name.

 

 

 

Have you had that person come in your life, right when you were feeling down and forgotten?

 

 

 

 

 

 

They made you feel like you mattered. Better yet, they made you believe you mattered. They were not ashamed of you. They were loyal to you, not thinking about how others might perceive them by being associated with you.

 

 

What a gem.

 

 

 

 

In Beth's study she says a line that I LOVED.

 

 

 

"Refreshers are rare finds in this narcissistic world."

 

 

 

 

She then asked me to write anyone who came to mind who had been that to me when I was scorched and dry.

 

 

 

That was a much less painful task, obviously.

Take time to honor that person, or those few people if you're blessed with more than one Onesiphorus. Maybe you haven't spoken to them for a while, but when you look back at a time in your life when you were alone, down, needed encouragement, needed someone to talk to, needed prayer, needed a true friend who cared and went out of their way for you when others were too busy with their own life and problems... they came looking for you and refreshed you.

 

 

 

2 Timothy 1:15-18 explains how Onesiphorus was so intent on seeking out Paul.

 

 

 

I know you would love to be sought out.


Deep inside, we all have that longing, it just takes some of us a little time to let go of our pride and admit we want to be loved and wanted.

 

 

 

 

 

 Onesiphorus must have really cared for Paul.

 

 

Not only cared for him, but that he was the only person who sought him out. Went miles looking for him. He didn't have a cell phone to message and say "Hey, Bro Paul! Let's meet up next week outside of Jerusalem for lunch." No, he had to go wandering and trust word of mouth as to where Paul had been and was.

 

I turned my phone off four days ago. Two days later, I did this particular bible study lesson.

The reason I turned off my phone was to pray. That was the main purpose. Make purposeful time to meet with God. My phone was an easy distraction to "unplug" from.

 

 

I'm always making time for Grant, our kids and often times others outside the home, and some days I feel I am giving God my leftovers, so to speak. I needed to get that back in check.

 

 

 

But, it's made me think the past few days, since doing this lesson, and obviously not talking to anyone unless I have seen them in person, who would come to my house looking for me if I just permanently turned my phone off? And how long would it take for them to come? A month? By Christmas? Something to think about...

 

 

Besides a handful of people in my life, I can't think of a ton to be honest.

 

 

 

 

 

How many people in your life would seek you out until they found you if you turned off all social media, your email, and your phone permanently with no warning?

 

 

 

It is a painful but liberating thought to think.

 

 

 

 Suddenly, you can weed out a lot of fair weather friends and picture maybe a handful in your mind right now.

 

I'm pretty sure you'd be lucky to have 3 of your 500 Facebook friends drive to your house within 6 months of inactivity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In Beth's study she gives the example of someone saying to you that they "wanted to catch up but they didn't have a way to get in touch", when the truth is...

 

they didn't bother searching for us until they found us.

 

 

 

 

 What a thought.


 

 

 

 

Now, let the roles reverse... when is the last time you have sought someone out?

 

 

I have been Onesiphorus. It took me gulping down some pride to put forth the effort a time or two, I do admit! But, they were worth my time.

 

 

 

Remember this.

 

 

Usually, the unthankful person, the standoffish person, and the down-right mean person are the loneliest.

 

 

Have compassion for them. One thing they all have in common is this... They all just want to be loved. They want to be cared for. Sure, they may put on a tough front and even push you away at times, or all the time. But, regardless, under that tough guy/chick act, they all have a soul inside that is longing for someone to show them compassion. They maybe have been hurt, maybe deserted by too many and that is why they won't let anyone in. But, just like the last line of the "Day 5 Lesson" in Beth's study, she says...

 

 

 

...don't give up on humanity. There are still Onesiphoruses in this world. Be one until you are found by one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

People will desert you. That is life. I have had to swallow that bitter pill time and time again in my short 28 (almost 29) years.

 

 

 But, just like with Paul, a REFRESHER will come along.

 

 

 

 

 

 I thank God for the refreshers in my life. Take time to thank yours and make it meaningful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

 

 Special thank you to my sister in law, Morgan. She has always read my blog and she often shares them with others and makes me feel that what I write encourages others, including herself. She is a woman of God and I want to openly thank her for being a Onesiphorus at many times in my life. She is eight years younger than me, but she has taught me things in life and as a wife, mother and Christian. She has fasted for me when I physically couldn't years ago and miracles happened during that time that are both very personal and intimate to her and I. She has held my hand and prayed with me time and time again. Whether we would have married into the same family or not, I still would have picked her as my friend.

 

 



Press On

 

 

 

 

We all win sometimes.

 

 

And sometimes, we lose.

 

 

 

 

 

I have learned more about myself, others, and God this past year, than at any other point in my life.

 

I've had some personal battles that I had to learn to fight myself.

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, God will fight for His own, and I am His.

 

But, just like David, he couldn't sling that stone for him, David had to fully rely on God and then go for it.

 

 

Go fight. He had to press on even when the odds were not in his favor in the human's eyes.

 

 

 

 

Maybe your giant isn't some 9 foot guy like David's, but boy, it's a giant.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your spouse calls you worthless.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

Your kid says they hate you.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You've been betrayed by a best friend.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

The doctor says you have 6 months.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You failed again.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You cried yourself to sleep last night, and you're dreading the evening.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You had another panic attack.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You feel like the world is against you.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You just found out your son hung himself.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You found out your spouse is cheating on you.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You felt humiliated.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You were treated unfairly.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You reputation has been jeopardized.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You don't have money for groceries and your three months late on rent.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

You said the wrong thing.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You are misunderstood.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

You're afraid.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

You're alone.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

You lost.

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I've experience a handful of those. I've felt alone. I've felt betrayed. And I have lost.

 

 

 

 

Something that I have learned though, is that everyone is not always going to get "you." Sometimes they won't appreciate you, no matter how kind you are. But, you can not base your worth off of their lack of joy, kindness and peace in their own life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Press on.

 

 

 

 

 

It says in the Bible that God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.

 

 

 

Do you know what?

 

 

 

Your happiness should not ever be based off of a circumstance.

 

 

 

That doesn't mean you're in the wrong for having a bad day or feeling less than awesome, but we aren't slaves to fear anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

If you are a blood bought child of God, it says in His Word that he GAVE YOU...

 

 

YOU, stay at home mom

 

YOU, preacher

 

YOU, salesman

 

YOU, lawyer

 

YOU, pastor's wife

 

YOU, Gas Station clerk

 

YOU, evangelist

 

YOU, husband

 

YOU, single parent

 

YOU, mother praying for her lost children

 

YOU, wife asking God for a miracle to save your husband's life

 

YOU, teenager

 

YOU, child of God

 

 

 

 

 

HE GAVE YOU the spirit of POWER

 

 

Power to overcome depression and anxiety and suicidal thoughts.

 

Power to be set apart in a wicked world.

 

Power to become the woman of God that He has intended you to become all along.

 

Power to forgive those who don't deserve it and those who didn't even ask for your forgiveness.

 

Power to do His will for your life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

HE GAVE YOU the spirit of LOVE
 

 

Love to win over your lost son and daughter.

 

Love to be able to lay down your pride to protect someone else.

 

Love to kindly sharpen a friend who is starting to walk away from the Lord.

 

Love to cherish your spouse, regardless of how they treat you.

 

Love to show kindness in a loveless world.

 

Love to forgive someone who hurt you, and they don't care.

 

 

 

 

 

 

HE GAVE YOU the spirit of a SOUND MIND

 

 

A sound mind to sleep peacefully and work calmly throughout the day.

 

A sound mind to see the bigger picture on a scale that is with Eternity in mind.

 

A sound mind to know you are saved from a devils hell and from all the destruction Satan wanted to cause in your life and family.

 

A sound mind that is NOT a slave to fear.

 

A sound mind that is placing it's trust in the fact that when you patiently endure, you'll obtain the promises of God.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

God gave you that Spirit.

 

 

 

Press on.

 

 

 

Press on.

 

 

 

Hold your sword, which is the word of God, so tightly your hand freezes to it.

 

 

Watch your knuckles turn white as you PRESS ON into battle.

 

 

You are MORE than a conqueror.

 

 

 

 

 

PRESS ON, SOLDIER.