For my grandkids

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last week we buried my Granny.

I'm so thankful for the many times I had with her.

It got me to thinking, since I have this little page, why not write some stuff for my grandkids to read one day. (if the Lord doesn't come back by then)

 

 

 

 

Since I will be the big 3-0 in a couple of weeks, I will write that many random things.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. I was saved at 17 years old in Wellington, Kansas. The same town I was born 17 years prior.

 

2. I met Grant their. (your Grandpa) ok, now that feels weird writing being that our oldest is only 7.

 

3. I hope to write a book one day. Not for fame or fortune, but because God laid it on my heart.

 

4. One of my closest friends in the world died this year. Kay Francis O'Bar. She was your grandpa's aunt on his dad's side. I have struggled lately with her being gone. She called me more than anyone else to just check on me. Always, always check on people. It will mean more to them than you'll ever know.

 

5. We have one baby in Heaven. They passed away in my belly on December 15th, 2013.

 

6. My arms are double jointed.

 

7. The first time I ever saw the Ocean I was with my mom and older brother at Myrtle Beach, in South Carolina. It was one of the happiest days of my life. I was around 12.

 

8. I stay on home right now and raise our three kids. I am homeschooling full time.

 

9. I suggest not having social media, or whatever they are calling it these days.

 

10. Raylea was the name of a fake baby I had in High School. I got NEGATIVE 120% on that thing. I pronounced "Raleigh".... "Ray-LEE," when trying to name that little battery operated baby doll. That is where my older brother lived and so I named the baby that. Grant at the time was just starting to like me and asked what the baby's name was. I told him. He had me repeat it several times. I said "RAYLEA!" He said "that is my mom and dad's middle names slid together!" I smiled and said, "well, if we get married one day and have girl we will name her that."

 

11. I went to NYC and DC in the 6th grade. Wish to go back one day with Grant.

 

12. I dream of living by the ocean. Anytime I stand next to the water, I seem to forget my problems and I can almost feel God touch me. His Hand is all over creation, just look around a little.

 

13. I used to be a bad people pleaser. There is nothing wrong with being kind, but don't please people over pleasing God. People will let you down, so don't be too offended when it happens.

 

14. Stop and smell the flowers. Seriously.

 

15. Thank God for the problems and issues you have. Like my favorite hymn says, "if I never had a problem, I wouldn't know God could solve them, wouldn't know what faith in His word could do."

 

16. Don't drink. It ruins lives.

 

17. I love taking baths. I take them nearly every night! Usually one of the kiddos gets in with me. So, it's not too relaxing, but I will have time for those before I know it.

 

18. I've never had a cavity. Hopefully you have my genes for that!

 

19. I was married at 19. December 29th, 2007.

 

20. Christmas is my favorite.

 

21. Never give up on people. Even if they've hurt you, lied about you, stomped on your heart... don't give up on them. God never gave up on you.

 

22. Cherish your spouse.

 

23. I've had a Maltese dog, Sophie since 2009. She is nearly 9. I am writing this on November 1st, 2018. We call her "Soph-a-Doph."

 

24. Grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup is my favorite meal of all time.

 

25. I love being with my family. Never take family for granted. They will be there when everyone else decides they are too busy for ya.

 

26. Fall in love with God. It's different than loving Him.

 

27. I like to hunt whitetail deer. I haven't killed any monsters, but hunting itself is very enjoyable to me. I do a lot of prayin' in the stand.

 

28. Wear your seatbelt. Always keep a close eye on your kids. They are my great-grandkids, you know.

 

29. I am 29. If you ever read this, I may be 69!

 

30. Make it count. Whatever you do in life, do it for God. Not for yourself or for another person. Make Him happy and seek His face. Get alone and talk to Him daily. Even if you have to do it in the dark of the night. He will meet you.

 

 



Fear. Depression. Suicide.

 

 

 

Fear.

 

He is a liar.

 

----------

 

Fear

 

you don't own me, there ain't no room in this story.

 

---------

 

Whom then shall I

 

Fear?

 

 

 

 

Just a few songs that are popular in our churches and on the radio regarding this byproduct of our thoughts. Yes, danger is a real thing, but I believe we make the choice to be fearful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know of someone who wanted to die a couple years ago because they feared nobody loved them, nobody cared, and those who acted like they cared, only did it because they had to.

 

 

 

 

That someone was me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My cousin Crosby Jane, taught on what depression is last week at Bible Study. (You did an excellent job, Cros.)

 

But, it made me start thinking again about how I got to that point. Sure, there were some situations in my life that were stressful, but everyone has those. I realized I allowed fear to overtake me. Not just in my thoughts, but in my actions. It started out where I was scared to drive some days, thinking I might get in a wreck and die. These fears eventually made me feel weird, alone and like I could surely never open up to anyone about them. So, I kept to myself. Me, and my scared little self. Those scant worries, turned into a countless list of fears.

 

 

I started to fear I wasn't good enough for my husband and kids. I was afraid I was letting them down. I allowed this fear, weaved with insecurities, to find it's way into all my relationships. I tried so hard to win others over, my closest friends, surface relationship friends, and acquaintances, all the while I was making myself feel worse because they weren't meeting my unrealistic expectations of being extra kind back.

 

I thought to myself, I am just a waste of time! Why am I even here? I have no big talents, callings or gifts. I never went to college and got a degree. I don't even have a social media page to post photos on to make others believe I am happy at least!  

 

 

 

When in reality, I was a wreck.

 

 

 

I was a hidden wreck.

 

 

 

 

My very closest friends had no idea I was depressed. They had no idea I felt I was a problem to them. A second thought. On the back burner. I never even told my husband. And I tell him everything.

 

 

 

 

So, how did I become depressed? It's now been over a year and a half ago that I was supernaturally delivered, so I've had time to somewhat think it over. I believe I was overcome with fear in every single area of my life.

 

 

 

 

 

I feared I was a failure, and if I wasn't failing in an area, I soon would be.

 

I feared my family wouldn't even miss me if I was gone.

 

I feared I wasn't making a difference.

 

I feared I wasn't enough.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, I suppose I want to write this today just for you. You person out there who is hiding behind something.

 

Maybe you have the social media page with all the beautiful photos and positive posts to hide behind. Or the college degree and great job.

Or the handsome husband and cute kids.

Or the title of being a preacher.

Or the position at a church.

Or the makeup and hair and pretty clothes.

Or the funny personality and big smile.

 

 

 

I hid behind kindness. I have always had a kind, tender, and (sometimes overly sensitive) heart. And so I did what I naturally knew to do to make myself feel happier. I tried to make everyone else happy. So, behind all my kind deeds, my over the top thoughtfulness, although, is pretty much the norm for this chick. I mean, Acts of Service is my top love language, people! I still hid behind it because I felt safe and like nobody would ever figure me out.

 

 

 So, instead of being kind, I did it over the top to anyone and everyone and it wore me out. Mentally and physically.

 

 

 

 

 

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

1 John 4:18

 

 

I felt tormented with my fear of worthlessness. I allowed my thoughts to become so negative about myself, I didn't like even my best qualities. I was absolutely tormented by Satan. Again, alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

2 Timothy 1:7

 

 

God never gave this spirit of fear to me. Instead, He gives the spirit of POWER, LOVE and a SOUND (controlled) MIND (thoughts.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Psalms 23:4

 

 

 

It doesn't matter how bad life is. I have a grandmother I visited just last weekend, who is entering that valley of the shadow of death. She wanted to pray with me when I asked her if she had any sin in her heart and wanted to make everything right with the Lord this summer when I called her on the phone. I have talked to my Aunt Connie all week through text messages and every day for the past two days she says her sister (my Granny) is resting peacefully. I believe that is because God is with her in these last moments. He is comforting her.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Lord is on my side; I will not fear: what can man do unto me?

Psalms 118:6

 

 

There is no lie, no rumor, no misunderstanding, that the Lord won't be on your side about. I am always quick to forgive because I have messed up many times. But, I also have been completely innocent and had to allow God to defend me! I had to trust that He would make it all right. And He ALWAYS has. God will defend you! Don't try defending yourself!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ye shall not fear them: for the Lord your God he shall fight for you.

Deuteronomy 3:22

 

 

 

An echo of the verse above, let GOD do the fighting. I have went through things where I wanted to fight for myself or for a loved one. But, God has always spoken to me in a still small voice, that I won't do any good, I would only make it worse. So, by placing situations that are out of my control in His Hands, He sees I really do trust Him. You can trust Jesus.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Better is little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble therewith.

Proverbs 15:16

 

 

 

Don't worry about the little or even big stuff in life. Sure, that's easier said than done. We all fight our own battles and we all are fighting some alone and only God knows about them. But, fear, respect, honor and have reverence towards the Lord. Don't get yourself into trouble by worrying so much about your reputation, your bank account, your appearance, your number of likes or friends, your car you drive, the home ya live in. All that will be burned up in 100 years... I am not what I would call or consider a smart person, but I feel like the answer to every problem we have in life would be fixed if we'd truly apply this last verse. Fear the Lord.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lastly, if you are depressed, tell a trusted friend, family member, or minster.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THIS IF FOR YOU

 

 

 

You do matter and you ARE making a difference.

 

You were put here for such a time as this!

 

You are LOVED.

 

You are enough.

 

God has a purpose for you, one that nobody else can fulfill.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



I sure miss you

 

 

 

Have you ever had someone come into your life who changed it?

 

 

 

Really, changed it.

 

 

 

Aunt Kay did that for me.

 

 

Back in 2007 when I married my husband, I had been around Aunt Kay several times, since she is my husband's dad's sister, she isn't blood related. How many knows that blood is thicker than water, but in this case, Aunt Kay was thicker than a lot of blood.

 

 

I became close to her mom, and when she died on May 1st, 2009, I didn't know who I would have as my little buddy to spend time with anymore. That next year, Aunt Kay and I began talking often. We formed a tight friendship within a year.

 

 

 

 

 

 

She made my life happy.

 

 

Anyone who met Kay, knew she would talk your head off. We went on several little getaway trips together, and I would get so tickled at some of the questions she would ask people. Once we were at a fancy department store and a lady was trying some shoes and talking to her friend about what they were going to wear to the Derby. Of course, that was just enough information to get Aunt Kay's brain going with curiosity. "Do you mean the Kentucky Derby?!?!" Aunt Kay gawked! She asked a stream of questions to that private, preppy lady that day, including asking how much money her husband made. There was never a question off limit for her. That lady giggled and wasn't too offended.

 

(She always asked what you really wanted to know!)

 

 

 

She always wanted coffee. I can't tell ya how many cups of coffee, sandwiches and little simple meals I made for her while she sat in my house. She loved to be taken care of, and I loved taking care.

 

 

 

She was a diabetic. I have one story in particular only me and a close friend know the details to, and I will take that story to the grave with me! Let's just say, I am NOT meant to be a nurse.

 

 

 

Well, once she was at my house and her sugar was extremely low. I believe it was in the thirties. I hurriedly made a cup of chocolate milk and stirred in a ton of sugar because we never have pop or orange juice. I handed it to her and helped her drink it. I would say, "Aunt Kay, drink this." And she would take a sip, and look up at me. I would then say "drink this!" and she would ask, "drink what?!" and this went on for several minutes!

 

 

 

We were staying in a camper August 2017 in a church parking lot in Arkansas. Just me, her, and my three kids. Me and her slept on the queen bed. Raylea and Jack on the couch and Arrow was in a pack n play. Well, Aunt Kay didn't bring her sleep machine and she was snoring. Rather loud. I am a "sleep snob" and I can't sleep if someone is snoring. So, I went to the back of the camper and cleared off a bunk... but it was kind of uncomfortable. And yes, I have to have a comfortable mattress. I told you, I am a sleep snob! So, I go back to the bed with Aunt Kay.

 I start to notice a pattern. She doesn't breath for like 10 seconds! Then... this MONSTEROUS snore comes out as the bed rumbles.

I am terrified she is going to stop breathing or something and then that snore would erupt. Well, after HOURS of this, I was laying there, just staring at her. I couldn't believe she could sleep through her own snores! Then, out of the clear blue, well, the clear dark in this case, her eyes shot open and she stares perfectly at me! It freaked me out so bad, that I hurried and closed my eyes and acted like I was asleep. That next morning I told her all about what I went through, and she laughed and laughed.

 

 

 

She always loved recalling those stories.

 

 

 

 

Those were a few funny ones at the top of my head.

 

Even though I could nearly write a book of all the hilarious moments I had with her, which, one day, when I do write a book, I know her name will be in there.

 

 

 

If Jack would have been a girl, her name would have been Adaline Kay, after Aunt Kay. I can't imagine not having Jack Gannon though! (He is seriously the sweetest little boy you'd ever meet.)

 

 

 

Aunt Kay loved my kids so much. She always tried to come to their parties and always gave them lots of hugs and kisses. She always loved hearing about the comical things they had done or said. She always encouraged me to be a more godly wife and mom. She always said she was proud of me. She wrote me a card, two years ago. I have it in my curio cabinet in my bedroom, now next to the rose off of her casket. In the card she said "you have brought so much happiness to my life." I truly can't say how I did that. But, I do know we just enjoyed each other's presence. Maybe that is what she meant. At the end of the card she said she was sending the money for Arrow's outfit to wear coming home from the hospital. She always did stuff like that. Stuff that not many other's would think of doing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

She stayed.

 

 

When I think of some of the hardest times I have went through in my adult life, Aunt Kay was there. It's easy to be there for someone when it's their happy days, when they are on a mountain top in life, or when it's an easy season.

 

But, you can tell who your true friends are by simply looking back at your darkest moments, and remembering who was by your side. Who stayed.

 

 

 

 

We wanted a second baby, bad. We tried for 13 months. Finally, December 2013, we were expecting. Sometime after the sixth week though, my body had a miscarriage. August Shalom is what we decided to name that sweet baby. That next week I sat in church as my husband told what had happened to our church family. I was sitting between Aunt Kay and her husband, Dr. D. and they each were holding onto one of my hands as I sat there staring forward with tears streaming down my face. She stayed.

 

 

 

 

I went through depression fall 2016 through January 2017. Dr. D passed away in November 2016, so I tried hard to stay strong for Aunt Kay. I never once told her I was depressed. That I didn't want to live life anymore. That I felt worthless. I never told her all the lies the devil had yelled at me and I was believing them. But, the night I was delivered, I was able to call and tell her on the phone. She was so sad that I hadn't told her. She said, "Oh, baby, I wish you would have told me so I could have been praying for you! I would have been there for you!" She said that over and over that whole next week or two. I just was trying to protect her, as she already had so much on her plate.

 

 

 

Our life took a turn when God had my husband step away from his full time job last year. It was the hardest thing we ever had to do. It was tough some days. Okay, a lot of days. Kay didn't stop talking to me because things were hard in my life. No... She checked on me more than ever. She prayed for me. She lifted me up. She gave me godly advice. She made me laugh on days I felt like crying... or had been crying. She was a diamond in the middle of a great big mud puddle I felt myself in last year. She helped me through. She loved me through. When life didn't make sense and circumstances didn't feel comfortable... just the sound of her voice on the other end of the phone would suddenly make those dark clouds go away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I sure do miss her. I can't tell you how many days I have thought, "if I only had Aunt Kay to talk to right now, everything would be okay."

 

That's just what she did. She made everything seem okay.

 

 

 

Yes, the Lord is my Strength. He is my Stronghold. He is my Protector. He is my Joy.

Aunt Kay loved the Lord though. So, we had a common ground to stand on. We had the same values and we had the same final destination. She went a little sooner to that home than I wanted her to, but I know if she had the choice, she would not come back here.

 

 

 

She had to go.

 

 

 

March 9th, 2018. I felt I needed to go see my buddy that morning. So, me, Raylea, Aunt Betty and our close friend Brenda, ate breakfast and headed to go see her.

 

I will never forget those last hours I was with her. I straightened her jewelry on her hands and I held on to her hand and rubbed it gently and stared into her blue eyes. I told her I loved her so much. Raylea said some things to her and we just sat with her. She slept a lot. I knew it wouldn't be long.

I FaceTimed Danny, since he was in Missouri. She said "Hi, baby!" and kept leaning in trying to kiss the phone. Aunt Betty was with her that entire day and she said those were the only words she spoke. She sure loved her little brother..

 

 

Later that night, Grant went up to sit with her for several hours. Once it got late, he came home, but shortly after he crawled in bed, his cousin called and told him what we dreaded, yet expected, to hear. Aunt Kay was in Heaven. March 10th, 2018. So far, the saddest day of my life.

 

 

I can't remember everything about her funeral. I felt like it was an out of body experience. Not real. Her service was beautiful and joyful though. I had a hard time laughing, even though I knew she was perfectly whole and she had made it home! I was missing my friend. I was needing her love. But, that cold body in that beautiful pink casket wasn't moving.

 

 

Grant and his brothers sang "there ain't no grave" at the graveside. It was so special. The Lord came down on Grant as he spoke. God was there with us, even in the pain.

 

 

 

 

We know where she is.

 

 

 

Days passed and my phone wasn't ringing three or four times a day like it had for the past eight years. I listened to the countless voicemails I had on my phone that she had left me. Raylea was bothered nearly as bad as I was. Aunt Kay was like a grandparent to her. Raylea spent several nights crying as she went to sleep, saying she missed Aunt Kay. Then, one day, Raylea came up to me so calm and peaceful. She said, "Mama. I had a dream." I said, "you did? About what?"

 

"About Aunt Kay. She was in Heaven sitting on a little chair next to Jesus as he sat in his big king chair and she was talking to him. Jack and Nadine were next to her! Then, Uncle Darrel came up to Aunt Kay and hugged and kissed her!"

 

 

 

 

 

Jack and Nadine were Kay's parents. Raylea never met them, but we have pictures of them on the fridge and wall in our house and she's heard all about them.

 

I don't recall Raylea ever crying again about missing Aunt Kay. The Lord gave her that dream. She needed that dream.

 

 

 

 

Well, I know this is much different than any other post I have written.

 

I never wanted to write this one.

 

I wanted to have Aunt Kay in my life until I died.

 

 

 

But, one thing I have learned is that life doesn't usually go as we plan, or as we want.

 

 

Nearly six months ago, I lost one my truest friends. One that will never be replaced.

 

 

I will love deeper than ever before though, because I have seen how quickly those we hold closest to our hearts can be stripped away within a single breath.

 

 

 

Love those around you. Don't hold grudges. Call your grandma and tell her you love her. Text your sibling. Message your friend. Maybe it has been months or even years since you've spoken. That ends today.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here's some lyrics that I sing often when I am missing Aunt Kay.

 

 

I SURE MISS YOU
    
      If life could only bring again, the days I took for granted when
To hear your voice was just a call away
Oh what I'd give for just some time, to say the things that slipped my mind
There's so much now I'd really like to say
But I can never go back when we did the things we did back then
I'll store those precious memories in my mind
I'll take what you've instilled in me; I'll try to be all I can be
And walk the path that you have left behind

    
      I sure miss you; life will never be the same with you not here
Each passing day has brought much pain
But with God's grace my strength remains
I sure miss you, but heaven's sweeter with you there

    
      The little things that seemed so small are now gold in a memory vault
I cherish every one I have of you
Now I can see and recognize the part you played to shape my life
I often see you in the things I do
In God's design and master plan He saw the hurting hearts of man
As we would say goodbye to those so dear
So with our family and friends we'll be together once again
We'll view all heaven's splendor hand in hand

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

aunt kay and aunt bets.

 

 

 

 

her with my oldest two.

we borrowed this chair from aunt kay to take Raylea's one year photos on. 

 

 some random friend she made at the airport check in! I should have got a picture of her with the Kentucky derby gal. :)

 

girls trip in branson. just me and her. (and arrow)

 

aunt kay holding arrow for the first time at our house. dr d was in grant's recliner next to her. he passed away a few days later.

Raylea and her buddy.

 



 

 

Grant giving her a lift into the restaurant.

 

 

 



Leaning on the Lord

 

 

 

 

 

Have you been running from uncertainty? Have you been trying to force yourself to stay in a womb to stay protected and safe, yet you feel like a fish out of water? Something just isn't quite right... day after day.

 

 

God is a moving God. God is a shaker.

 

 

Emerge into the next place God has for you!

 

 

Labor is necessary to give birth!

 

 

 

Growth is always disruptive!

 

 

It will usually cause pain.

 

 

 

It'll hurt somebody, somewhere, when you are moving to the next dimension. And sometimes that somebody is you.

 

 

 

To be in God's will, to grow, to push out of the womb I'm in, I must be willing to put my feelings and emotions aside and press on to the great calling the Lord has on my families life. You must be willing to do the same if you want to grow! A child must leave it's mothers womb to grow.

 

 

 

 

That will mean saying no. That will mean saying yes. That will mean staying and sometimes it'll mean you gotta go. That means somebody is going to be upset, somebody will be angry and yes, somebody is going to talk about you. Somebody is not going to believe in you or support you.

 

 

 

As a great preacher once said "it is not your job to manage people's feelings and emotions."

 

 

 

 

God didn't place you in a womb to keep you there. Sure, it's a season, but you gotta go if you wanna grow. You can't stay on the milk forever. You can't stay worried about people misunderstanding you and gossiping about you. I used to be there, but in Jesus name, I never will be again. I'm growing!

 

 

 

You must be willing to lay down your desires and your wants and your will. Cast them into the sea. Allow God to start revival in your soul today! Stop being so concerned with what is going on at a church, family, or business across town or across the country that you miss what God has set right in front of you.

 

 

 

Put the phone down (after you finish reading this) and find your toddler and read them a book. Cuddle and tickle and kiss them. Stop scrolling through Facebook and open up THE Book. I told someone a couple months ago who was constantly seeing negative things on their Facebook to delete it for a month. Just 30 days. I have no idea if they did it or not, but I am confident if they would, they would have a new perspective on some things. What you dwell on, is what you'll become. You dwell on the past, you'll live there. You dwell on God's promises and what He claimed over your future and you'll live it!

 

 

 

 

Since we've been married, we've had to be pushed out of multiple wombs. We are learning what it means to lean on God. Friends will forsake, but the Lord, He will stick closer than a brother.

 

 

 

A wise woman told me that we were called to have God's approval, not everyone else's. Wow. That's a thought, isn't it? How often do you dress for people's approval, we go to a certain place and put filters on our photos. We buy houses and cars and feel we need to have our kid at the top of their class, wearing the best outfit in the room. What's even more sad, is this has subtlety crept into our church. Our youth. Our young children. I was shocked when Raylea, our oldest, came in contact with her first clique at the young age of four. My Uncle Zane preached this Sunday morning an amazing message on brotherly love. What I got out of it was, if we can't love others, forgive others and say we are sorry to others, we aren't even really saved. I agree 100%.

 

 

 

Jesus said in the book of John, that we are to love one another as He loves us. And that by us loving each other, all men will know that we are followers of Christ, if we have love for each other.

 

 

(John 13:34&35)

 

 

 

 

How more straight do you need it? If you really want your lost son to come home, why won't you make peace with those around you? If you really want your husband to be born again, stop holding a grudge about something he did 20 years ago. If you struggle with unforgiveness, I beg you to study the Bible today and see how serious it is that we forgive each other. Not just forgive, but truly truly humbly forgive them. Over and over again.

 

 

 

 

 

I have messed up so many times. I have said hurtful things. And in turn, I have had hurtful things said to me. But, I know if I want my heart to stay pure and right, I must daily ask for forgiveness to the Lord and to anyone who comes in contact with me who I offend even the slightest. I pray for my heart to be tender, even when other's are calloused.

 

 

 

Offer a hug even if you'll be rejected.

 

Pray for your enemies.

 

Wonders will take place in your heart when you can pray for those who hurt you.

 

Wonders will take place when you stop dwelling on the pain and start hoping for peace.

 

 

 

Sometimes, people don't want peace, so you'll have to be okay with that. I have been down that road, and it's a tough, lonely place to be when you are begging for someone to love you and they push you away the harder you try. You will eventually believe the lie that nobody cares for you, that you must do more to win over their love and acceptance and ultimately you'll believe that you will never be enough. Do not go there.

 

 

Do not allow yourself to believe the lie that you are forever in this dark storm and everyone has forgotten you. Because, the truth is, people may have forgot you. Remember, people come in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. People may have decided they don't need you in their life anymore. People may simply be too busy or distracted by their own problems, blessings and life to remember that you were once there for them. It is hard to accept change, but to grow, to mature, to push on to the next level in your walk with God, you have to go through these types of change, rejection, and disruption.

 

 

 

 

 

Stop what you're doing and ask the Lord to soften your heart. Is there someone you need to go to and apologize to? Maybe it was something said years ago, or maybe it is something only you know about. When you say sorry, you do it unto the Lord. Is there someone you stopped talking to because their life took a different direction, and so you stopped putting forth the effort? Call them. Shoot them a text and ask how life is. It always amazes me how special someone feels when I simply pick up the phone, take two minutes to call them and ask how they are and if there is anything I can pray for them about. Give your spouse a big ole kiss when you see them next. Call your adult child and tell them you want to take them on a weekend trip, just the two of ya. Call your friend and just tell them you appreciate them being a friend, in the good and the bad. Make peace with people. Do your part, even if it isn't well accepted. God will deal with their heart and just pray for them to be convicted by the Lord as you were. Remember... COVER. Cover their sin. Cover their wrong doings. Whether you receive an apology or not, it is the CHRISTIAN thing to do, to cover their sin with love.

 

 

 

 

Lastly, I want to quickly share a moving moment in my life. Last month we were on a family vacation with our friends and headed to Dixie Stampede in Branson, Missouri. As we pulled past the Ride the Ducks attraction, we saw the two boats fixing to head out for their tour. I thought to myself how I'd honestly rather go do that, but we already had tickets and plans with our friends to eat dinner and watch Dixie. About an hour and half later we started receiving texts from people who knew we were in Branson, asking if we were okay, that a boat had capsized. We got online and saw the tragedy unfolding on the news before our eyes. National headlines for the days to follow, an event that took place just a couple miles away from us. A quick nasty storm came in and one of the boats, sank. 17 people lost their lives. Many more people's lives were forever changed. One woman lost her kids, her husband and multiple other family members. She said in an interview that when they found her husband, he was holding her babies. One of the babies was the same age as our daughter, Arrow. Arrow loves water. She will climb into a pool when given the opportunity. We have to keep a very close eye on her. She has zero fear of anything. She is strong and brave. But, this little baby died in her daddies arms on their family vacation. Never to experience her second birthday, which we will celebrate for Arrow in a few months. The next morning we were headed to a gospel singing and we passed the parking lot and saw all the cars left. The owners never made it back. They were in eternity that whole night before. I lost it. I buried my face in my hands and I wept. I went into the florist shop in the grocery store and bought two sets of roses and our older two kids placed them on a van. That changed our family. No, I'm not a perfect wife. Grant's not a perfect husband. But we have purposed in our hearts to remember that day and it has changed us as people. It has changed us as Christians. We no longer seem to worry so much about the little stuff. I don't get so frustrated when Arrow dumps out the entire box of cereal, right after she took her diaper off and peed all over the floor and pulled all of my jewelry out of the cabinet. No. I smiled. I got a rag and started to clean up the mess. I sit and play with my kids more. I asked Grant last night as he was falling asleep if he wanted a back rub and Jack said, "rub my back" as he laid on his belly next to his dad. So, I rubbed my boys' backs and thoroughly enjoyed it. I planned more hands on things for our school year instead of making them do so much paper work. We will cook and bake and make a big mess. We will write letters to people and go see the old folks at the nursing  home. Grant is the most giving person I have met, and I have seen him become even more generous with his time and money. We will be different because we realized how short time is. We realized that could have been us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I pray you allow the Lord to soften your heart today and to realize you are loved by the Maker of this world. Stop trying to figure it all out on your own. God has unbelievable plans for you and no force of hell can come against them. You are God's! Start loving, forgiving and growing like it!

 

 



Cast It: Part One- Relationships

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today I'm going to share a simple thought I had yesterday while I was reading.

 

 

If you have time open your Bible and read the seventeen verses in Jonah, chapter 1.

 

 

 

Now, I'm going to zone in on a few verses.

 

 

12    And he said unto them, Take me up, and cast me forth into the sea; so shall the sea be calm unto you: for I know that for my sake this great tempest is upon you.

 

13    Nevertheless the men rowed hard to bring it to the land; but they could not: for the sea wrought, and was tempestuous against them.

 

15    So they took up Jonah, and cast him forth into the sea: and the sea ceased from her raging.

 

17    Now the Lord had prepared a great fish to swallow up Jonah....

 

 

 

 

 

 

My simple nugget to give today is this. How often do we face a storm, feel stuck inside a cyclone so to speak, because there is something that is displeasing to the Lord in our boat?

 

 

There are many reasons you may be feeling uneasy, unhappy and unsettled in your spirit, day by day and night by night.

 

 

I will make this kind of a series.. (can you tell I'm married to a preacher?!)

 

 

 

 

The first Jonah you must give over to the Lord and cast into the sea for peace to come on your waters is.....

 

 

 

 

Relationships.

 

 

 

There is such a thing as an ungodly/unholy soul tie.

 

 

Maybe you justify the friendship because they are a Christian, or because they were your childhood best friend, or because you are family.

 

 

Listen, if someone is not drawing you closer to God, why do you have them actively in your life?

 

 

There is a big difference in witnessing to someone and showing them the love of God----

and being around someone who gossips about others (and I assure you, if they are talking about others to you, they are talking to others about you as well), always makes you feel worse about yourself and about your circumstances and is only your friend when it's convenient for them.

 

 

 

 

 

In Proverbs it says how iron is used to sharpen iron and how a friend will do that to you and vise versa.

 

You need to be selective with the men (if you're a man) and women (you ladies) you surround yourself with.

 

 

 

I had a friend a while back say her husband was justifying going on lunch dates with a coworker of the opposite sex. That is absolutely ridiculous in my personal opinion. I told her that too. She was asking for my advice... so I told her! Do not give place for the devil. I don't care if it's your pastor, youth pastor... if you are not closely related, don't be alone, even in public, when it comes to the opposite sex. Gives people the opportunity to talk, gives the devil a foot in the door and could just set you up for all sorts of failure.

 

 

 

 

I love that old saying. Show me your friends, I will show you your future.

 

 

If you spend a lot of your time around people who are toxic, you'll soon become that way.

 

 

If you spend your time with someone who doesn't hinder your relationship with God but rather, they encourage it, you'll soon be more of a nourishing friend yourself!

 

 

 

Remember, two are better than one. When one falls, the other is there to lift the other up. I am so thankful for those friends who have lifted me up. Who encourage me with their words. Who cover me with love rather than uncover me and tell others my faults or share my wounds, hurts, dreams and aspirations.

 

 

I have an 8 word question....

 

 

Do your friends want to be like you?

 

 

Or are you an example of what they strive to not be like...

 

 

..that's a humbling thought if you'll sit and answer that honestly..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cast that relationship into the sea and give it to the Lord.

Let me explain.

 

 

Maybe it's a close friend. It's your dad. It's your mom. It's your sibling. It's your in-law. It's your aunt or uncle.

 

 

If you have tried, if you have sought peace and offered forgiveness or asked for it, and they still degrade you, you need to give them to the Lord. Be ready at all times to have arms wide open if they come back at a later date and seek peace with you.

 

 

If you're a Christian, that will be your desire. Peace with others.

 

 

 

Now, if you are that other person though, you are the one holding onto bitterness and you are being unforgiving and hateful and trying to get others to side with you... (I've seen and heard this happen one too many times) you need to ask the Lord to forgive you. Then, if possible, if they are still alive, go to them. Do what you can to make peace. Sometimes people will push you away, that's going to have to be something you are okay with. Look at all the people who rejected Christ, do you think you're any better? But, God is always there with arms open to anyone who wants a relationship with Him. And we should be NO DIFFERENT.

 

 

 

 Are you dating someone who pressures you to do ungodly things? I'm not just meaning sexually, but even the movies they watch with you or the music they play in their car. What goes in, will come out. That is why I'm a big believer in listening to what will glorify God, because my life will then do so much more easier.

 

Have heart to heart with that guy or gal. If they can't see where you're coming from, let them go. Trust me, they will find someone else to spend their evenings with and someone else who has no morals or maybe just no backbone.





Maybe you let down your convictions that you once had because the influence of a friendship. Once again, if they can't respect your values and convictions, you don't need to waste anymore time nourishing that ungodly soul tie. They will bring you down much sooner than you will lift them up.
Grant has given an illustration a few times where he stands on a chair or pew and has someone try to pull him down while he tries to pull them up. Never fails. The person can be half Grant's size, but they will pull him right down to their level. That is what the devil does when you link up with ungodly friends. He uses them and their influence to pull you down.

 

 

 

I used to idolize people who rejected me. I really did. I worried myself sick over people who I was never going to be good enough for. Or people who just didn't want to be Hannah's friend anymore. I took it personal. A lot more personal than I care to admit. God had to teach me a hard and, I'm not proud to admit this, but a long lesson, that I will not have everyone's approval. And if I have it, that doesn't mean it's there to stay. I will eventually do or say something that isn't just right or I will not be convenient anymore. I let my worth in other's eyes, define me for some time. God had to deliver me supernaturally from this not too terribly long ago.

 

I thank Him for this freedom. I thank Him for that lesson!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pray this for yourself and for others.

 

Lord, I give you __________. Let me (them) draw close to You today. Free my (their) mind from rejection and unforgiveness. I want my heart only right and pure before You. You Lord, are who I will stand before one day, so clean and clear my heart, mind and soul in this moment. I lay it all down at Your feet. I cast this care onto you, I am not delivering it to you, but I am CASTING it. They are in your control. All people to come in my life who sharpen me spiritually and who I can sharpen. Remove people who will bring harm and discord. Prune and cut out relationships if they are going to bring down a path that is not in Your will for my life. Let me be thankful for this process, not bitter or angry or hurt. I thank You, Father, for being the friend who sticks closer than a brother. You are there when nobody else is. All friends will fail me at some time, even spouses, parents and children. And not only will they fail me, I will fail them! Allow me to look at my faults and my wrong doings more quickly than I look at others. Soften my heart and break down all walls that are between me and You.

In Jesus name.. Amen.

 

 

Notice in verse 17, the Lord had prepared a fish to swallow Jonah. God will take care of the issue, the person, the sin, if you will cast it out to Him. Stop trying to fix the person, stop trying to force them to love you, stop trying to make them serve God, stop trying to get them to accept your apology, stop trying to be friends with someone who is not at all for you but rather against you, stop taking them into your hands and cast them over to the One who made them. When you do, your boat will stop shaking so bad. You will see a rainbow after this storm.





 

 

There is sadly many relationships, mother/child, wife/husband, father/child, boyfriend/girlfriend, friend/friend... were there is abuse going on. The same advice applies, but you may need to take more action. If you're being hurt and you're in danger, seek godly help or call the police. Until this other person gets in a place where you can be around them and be safe, you need to remove yourself from their presence.






Building Up or Tearing Down

 

 

 

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may Minister Grace unto the hearers. And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby you are sealed unto the Day of Redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be you kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you.

Ephesians 4:29-32

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Negative words can have a lasting effect. We've all encountered the bitter aftertaste of words that were spoken to us, about us, or from our own mouths.

 

 

Have you shared with someone your deepest hurts, concerns and feelings about a situation? Or about other people?

 

 

"But, they were prayer request," you defend! Ah-ha! Let me guess then, you guys held hands and lifted those poor folks up in prayer right there at your Applebee's booth. I highly doubt that.

 

 

 

I have had a few foot-in-mouth moments myself. If you say you haven't had any, you are probably just oblivious to the fact that you have. Or... you're lying.

 

 

 

Seriously though, think of a time you said something that was just not nice. Maybe it was true.

There are a lot of things that are true that we could say, but that doesn't make it okay.

 

 

 

 

If we would all just live by that good ol' saying...

If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say anything at all!

 

 

 

 

Wow. Imagine that. Social media would lose all it's drama. The news would have nothing to say anymore. We all would have to learn how to hold a conversation again. Your prayer meetings would get a lot more spiritual. Your anxiety would diminish. The world would look at the church as a unified body of loving, forgiving believers instead of a house full of hypocrites staring down their noses, back biting each other.

 

 

 

 

Now, there is a time to correct a friend, which we all should be okay with, if we really want to be closer to the Lord. Friendship is so much more than buying each other birthday presents and even more than defending them when nobody else is. True friendship is always growing. True friendship sharpens each other. To grow, there will be some discomfort. Like a seed when it comes in contact with water, it has to burst out of it's shell and push through the ground above. There is always work and some pain when something is growing, and that includes relationships. This allows forgiveness, mercy, and grace and your hearts to be turned to the Father in those dark valleys. Like it says in Proverbs, "Open rebuke is better than secret love." Meaning, a love that says and does nothing is not as valuable as an affection that rebukes.

 

 

 

 

And the next verse, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful."

 

A 'friend' who will kindly tell you of your mistakes or faults is not destructive, but helpful! The one who flatters you and tells you everything is well, when in reality it's not, is said by God to be "deceitful" and that means an 'enemy.'

 

 

 

 

 

A godly friend will always guide you back to the Cross in every situation and faithfully help you in the good and the bad times.

 

 

 

 

 

I am so thankful for people who have lovingly corrected me in my Christian walk. When I first was saved I needed lots of correcting and guiding. They didn't call me out in front of a group of people. They didn't mention me as a prayer request to someone else behind my back. They didn't bad mouth my shortcomings to their other friends. No, those godly saints lovingly covered me in prayer in those moments. They didn't say they would pray and then go off and gossip about me to someone else. They held my hand and prayed. One lady out of state prayed with me over the phone just last year when I was fighting something in my heart. They not only prayed, they gave me the Word. They brought it to me and applied it to my situation. They wrote me a card in the mail. They stayed with me at the altar. They were used greatly by Jesus.

 

 

 

 

 

My favorite hymn, Through it All, says in it,

 

 

 "I've had many tears and sorrows, I've had questions for tomorrow, there've been times I didn't know right from wrong, but in every situation, God gave blessed consolation, that my trials come to only make me strong."

 

 

 

I have goose bumps just typing those words.

 

 

 

 

Through it all God will be there. Through your dark, lonely times. Through your biggest failures and shortcomings. During your greatest victories. Through every season, He is there. I read just this morning about Job and how even his own wife, who was supposed to be his HELP meet was being a HINDERANCE meet, told him to curse God and just die! God was still with Job even when his own wife wasn't encouraging him anymore. Sometimes, we go through personal trials and dry, lonely deserts without anyone there to offer comfort. But, I promise you this, God is there with you. If you are a Child of God, His Spirit is inside of you. No better friend than the One you'll have in Jesus.

 

 

 

 

 

Alright, so...back to your tongue.

 

You blew up and said something hateful to your spouse. You said something cruel to your kid. Or your adult kid. You mentioned someone's name and spoke about them in a rude way and you didn't even know why you did it. You found yourself just listening and maybe agreeing to someone who was venting to you about someone. You were short with the cashier because they didn't give you enough change. You wrote off your dad because of the things he said and did to you 25 years ago. You talked all the way home from church about the preacher's message in a negative way. You put down someone's appearance. You were hateful to a friend and you justified it and you've never even considered apologizing because your pride won't let you. You talk about all the things your husband does wrong to your mother. You talk about your wife to your best friend. You talk about so-and-so's family and how they don't know how to raise children correctly. You complain about the church's carpet color. You unleash your anger on Facebook about how bad someone treated you ten years ago. You yelled at the waitress because your order was incorrect.

 

 

 

 

The list could go on and on and on... so many examples of how we allow corrupt communication to come out of our mouths.

 

 

Scroll back up and read the first verse at the top of this post.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's okay, I will wait for you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Okay, so what did it say? Paul says to let NO corrupt communication come out of your mouth! NONE. Zilch. Obviously, with technology these days we can communicate through a phone or laptop, but it still applies. So, what do we say then? We can edify others. No, we must! If we want to live a victorious life united with Jesus AND others, we must edify each other. I don't care if they don't look like you, don't go to your church, offended you on multiple occasions, or don't speak your language. Try the rest of this week to not say a SINGLE corrupt word about someone, and when you feel the urge to still talk, then BUILD THEM UP!

 

 

Think about that.

 

 

 

Does what you say of others build them up or tear them down?

 

 I started something several months back. When I started to have a negative thought, (because we all know what we think on, we will eventually speak out loud) but when I have a negative thought about a person or a situation, instead of allowing Satan to use my own God given brain against me, I say a prayer for that person or about that situation and I give it over to God and pray blessings. It has brought so much peace to my heart and life and I have been able to help other people do the same thing when they come to me with a negative comment, opinion or fact about something.

 

 

 

When we speak negativity, it says in the Bible we are grieving the Holy Spirit.

Who in their right mind would want to do that?

 

 

 

Lastly, we are told to let all bitterness, anger, jealousy... anything EVIL or UNGODLY, we are to PUT IT AWAY FROM US.

 

 

Be kind to others, tenderhearted and forgiving each other, JUST as Christ forgave US!

 

 

 

Just think, we would see so many more people saved if they saw the church reconcile amongst themselves. If they saw it's members stop gossiping and tearing each other down. If they would stop being jealous of the group of friends across the church. If they would come to worship God instead of come to church to sit with their clique and go to lunch with their clique. Why don't you sit by a stranger this coming service? Why don't you offer to buy their meal afterwards? Edify and lift them up. You have no idea how many people are out there just waiting for one person to make them feel loved. One person to make them feel like they matter in this great big world.

Show them what a Christian really looks and talks like.

 

 

 

 

 

The devil will always fight God's people and try to make the Church as whole look foolish and bad to the world. Stop giving him room by allowing him to control your tongue. Get down on your knees and ask God's forgiveness. I promise you, there is nothing like being washed by the Blood and allowing God's SON to shine in your life. Peace and contentment is what it'll bring. Not as the world gives, but peace that only comes through the Father.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you for your time and I pray you draw closer to God today.

 

 

 

 

 

The Happy Church

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wishing she could become invisible, she sat there with her arms crossed.

 

 

She knew the routine. Singers and musicians would come to the stage. Pastor would cry as he asked people to give Jesus a chance.

 

 

She had sat through nearly three months of this weekly and she had stayed strong, not giving in. She would argue with herself that she knew there was God and she knew she was going to Heaven. She reminded herself she was baptized just five years prior at the church down the street. She was a pretty good girl too. She had the respect from all of her friends' parents at least.

 

 

 

she thought to herself...

 

Yes, I am saved. I don't need to make a big deal and go to an alter and have everyone stare at me. I am just fine. Just a few more minutes and I can get out of here.

 

 

 

 

Her heart pounded harder. Faster. She looked up to see her dad, the pastor and the assistant pastor asking if she would like to come pray. How could she say no these men?

 

 

 

She got up, unsure of what was even happening or what on earth she was supposed to do when she got down there.

 

 

 

The three men laid their hands on that seventeen year olds back and prayed.

 

 

 

She choked back the tears and she tried to keep strong.

 

 

What is happening??

 

 

Tears fell.

 

 

She looked up to see the Pastor looking straight at her, and with tears rolling down his face he said to her, "God knows what those tears mean. You don't have to say a word."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

FIVE YEARS BEFORE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This girls father had been delivered supernaturally from alcoholism. Gambling. A marriage that was falling apart.

 

 

 

The family started to attend a church but after five years, the pastor left.

 

 

 

The girls mom said, "Can we go to the Happy Church??" She was speaking of the Free Will church down the road that they passed each time they left their current church and were headed home. Everyone always was smiling outside and they sometimes heard the music from inside as they drove past.

 

 

 

"Well, they bought carpet from me in the past and I know of them, so we can try it." the dad replied.

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, that October of 2005 they began attending the Happy Church.

 

 

 

That November the girl's mom threw her a surprise birthday party for her 17th. So many people from the Happy Church came. The garage was filled with people she only knew for less than a month.

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE & A HALF MONTHS LATER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As she stared back at that Pastor, she realized there was something much deeper to God than she had realized.

He knew what her tears were saying.

 

 

 

 

God began placing people in her life who knew what it really was to be Christ-like.

 

 

 

Then on an ordinary Wednesday night, a man was giving his testimony for the first time in the youth room of the yellow bricked Happy Church. He told about how God changed his life in ways that were very similar to how God changed her dad's life. She listened. He gave an alter call and the singers sang. Nobody went forward. She was keeping strong once again. But this time something was different, very different.

 

 

 

He said, "Singers, please sing one more song. I feel like somebody is supposed to come down here."

 

 

The girl was sitting a few rows back, and she knew that somebody was her. Without giving it a single thought, she made her way to that wooden altar at the front of the building and knelt down. She was surrounded by every person in that room, praying over her as she accepted the Lord as her Savior and repented of her sins.

 

 

 

 

Less than two years later, that girl married the Pastor's nephew, who she met at the Happy Church.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That Happy Church is the Wellington Free Will Baptist Church.

 

That Pastor is Zane Brooks.

 

The man who gave his testimony in the youth building that Wednesday night is Jason Bruns, who is now Pastor Zane's assistant pastor and the church counselor.

 

That girls' parents are David and Laurie Gaston.

 

The nephew of the Pastor that the girl married is Grant Ledbetter.

 

 

 

 

 

And that girl... is me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was born in 1988 at the St. Luke Hospital there in Wellington, Kansas.

 

 

And the best day of my life happened seventeen years and four months later, on Wednesday, March 15th, 2006, just a couple miles away as the crow flies.

 

 

 

 

That was 12 years ago, this month. I have never regretted my decision of making Jesus Christ the Lord of my life. I only regret that I didn't make the decision sooner, but God knew when I would get saved and when it would bring Him the most glory.

 

 

 

 

I thank God for the people who were there for me those months leading up to the day I was saved. I thank God that they never gave up on me or made me feel less of a person because I wasn't saved. The Happy Church has since grown and has now nearly filled up their new church.

 

 

 

My dad is the head Deacon and a Sunday School teacher, and my little brother and his wife are the Wee Worship Leaders. I feel so much joy to see God using my family in the very church I was saved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you need joy, peace, an answer to all that is wrong... remember, God knows what your tears mean.

Don't wait until it is too late to accept Him. Don't let that last song pass you by.

 

 

 

 

 

 

For all have sinned, and come short of the Glory of God;

Romans 3:23

 

For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.

Romans 5:6

 

 

 

 

 

 

You see, we've all sinned. But there's a remedy! Jesus Christ!

 

 

He is the remedy for your wretched soul and for your pain and heartache. He is the remedy for your loneliness and isolation. He is the remedy for your anxiety and depression.

(I know, I dealt with both of them.)

 

 

 

He is the remedy for your broken marriage. He is the remedy for your backbiting tongue. He is the remedy for your unforgiveness.

 

 

 

He is the remedy for your fear of the future. (Trust me, I dealt with this too.) He is the remedy for when you feel rejected and forgotten. He is the remedy for your soul.

 

 

 

Make Him Lord over every part of your life. Not just the parts that are easy to give Him.

 

 

 

No, lay your pride down and be a friend, not an enemy. Be a supporter, not discouragement. Be a helper, not a hindrance. Be a soul winner, not a hypocrite. Be joyful instead of sorrowful!

 

 

 

Speak life to and about others rather than death. God has taught me so much since the day I was saved. Some lessons I had to learn alone.. Some seemed unfair and rather hard. But, I believe to stay on fire for God, He must keep me under the fire to bring impurities out and to burn out anything that is keeping me from being in close communion with Him. That may include relationships. That may include dreams. That may include my plans. I might share that with Grant for him to preach! HAHA. Okay, but seriously, God is working on me and He won't stop until I make it HOME. I truly write with the prayer that someone out there is able to draw closer to the Lord by reading what I say.

 

Maybe just one person will do that, but I will gladly do that for you.

 

 

 

 

 

As always, THANK you for the time you took to read my words and for seeking the Lord.

 

He will be there with you when everyone and everything else is gone!

 

So, place all your happiness and contentment in Him, not a person or circumstance!

 

 

 

Have a FANTASTIC March. :)