Some Moms

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 My sister in law and I were talking and she made the statement about how Raylea has always had to be the guinea pig. Raylea is our almost 6 year old daughter, who is extremely smart, active and tender hearted.

 

 

 

I thought about how from the time she was born, she was not only our first child, she was the first grandchild on both sides of the family and she was the first baby amongst most all of my friends. Most of my friends were either still in college or newlywed. So, not only was she the guinea pig baby, I was the guinea pig mom.

 

 

 

I felt a lot of different emotions that first year as a new mother.

 

 

 

It made me think of how there are truly countless emotions a mom can feel and how every single situation really is different in it's own way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some moms have had tough roads.

 

 

Maybe you got pregnant as a teen and had that hardship of going from being a child yourself to raising one over night.

 

Some moms married their high school sweet heart, had a few kids and 30 years later find out their husband wants to separate.

 

Some moms work a 9-5.

 

Some moms stay home with their kids.

 

Some moms endured trials, losing a baby, or two, or five.

 

Some moms have a child who has a disability.

 

Some moms have a child who shouldn't have made it through the pregnancy.

 

Some moms had a child but lost them to a sickness at a young age.

 

Some moms feel insecure.

 

Some moms feel overly confident.

 

Some moms watched their adult child die from cancer.

 

Some moms raise their kids on their own, with little to no help from others. The dad left a long time ago.

 

Some moms aborted their baby.

 

Some moms take a child in from a horrible home and raise them as their own.

 

Some moms died giving birth.

 

Some moms pretend to have it all together, but inside, they are falling apart.

 

Some moms think their kid is the only one in the room who matters.

 

Some moms think all other kids are the devil, except their own, of course.

 

Some moms have lost their cool.

 

Some moms pray over their kids each day.

 

Some moms cuss their kids out each day.

 

Some moms use the excuse of "I never had a good mom, so I don't know how to be one," their entire life because they are too afraid of letting their own child into their world. They fear rejection that much.

 

Some moms favor one child over the other.

 

Some moms use their children for their own advantage in life.

 

Some moms won't let go, and they try to force their child into a future they think is fitting.

 

Some moms don't care.

 

Some moms just need a hug and some encouragement.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So much diversity.

 

 

It seems that is what is celebrated these days. To be different.

 

 

 

Well, I 'celebrate' how all moms are the same.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every mother was given a free will by their Creator to do with their children whatever it is they feel like doing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Helping or hurting... loving or leaving...

 

 

 

 

It is up to you, Mom.

 

 

 

God gave you a gift. The Bible explains your role. These days, that role is fogged by all the glitz and glamour of social media, our identity, and our status in life.

 

 

You aren't successful as a mom if your kid doesn't graduate with honors.

 

if they aren't prom king, if they aren't the captain of the football team, if they don't have a car that is less than 5 years old...

 

 

 

Making your kids fit in and be popular isn't what will get Jesus to say "Well done."

 

 

 

It isn't buying them the nicest clothes or the coolest little accessories. It's not feeding them healthy food, bathing them and making sure they are safe each day.

 

 

 

 

Your real job is this...

 

 

 

 

 

 

to live a life in front of them that reflects the godliness, the holiness, the love and character of God.

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you're human, and have been a mom for more than 2 days, you've likely made some form of a mistake regarding that precious little life. We all make mistakes. We all have to say we are sorry. How on Earth can we expect our kids to be able to know how to apologize to God for their sins and short comings when we can't even model that action?

 

 

 

 

 

I heard something pretty genius today.

 

 

 

"You can be gracious with the person, but you can't be gracious with the spirit."

 

 

 

They were talking about bad spirits.

 

 

It says in the Bible we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

(Ephesians 6:12)

 

 

 

Sure, be gracious with yourself, but not with that hateful spirit you've been having towards them.

 

 

 

Perhaps you aren't hateful, but you are jealous. You compare you kids to other people's kids and you can never just appreciate what you have. Or maybe it's a spirit of doubt. You pray for your child, but you doubt they ever will get saved.

Unforgiveness. You haven't forgiven your own mom for her short comings when you were growing up, and that holds you back as a mom... and person in general.

 

 

Look up what the Bible says about not forgiving others...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Immodesty. If you're walking around wearing stuff that makes others take a second look, don't wander why she is doing the same thing here in a few years.

 

 

 

Stop tolerating sin. Stop tolerating the evil spirits attacking you as a mother.

 

 

Address it and call it what it is and GO TO JESUS.

 

 

 

Black is black and white is white. I don't believe in grey areas.

 

 

There is HOLY and there is UNHOLY.

 

 

There is God and then there is Satan.

 

 

 

Pick who you will serve. Likely, your children will follow in your foot steps.

 

 

 

 

Remember... you have a free will to do what you want.

 

 

 

 

Choose wisely.

 

 



Venting and Honesty

 

 

 

 

I like honesty.

 

 

Well, honestly, I love it.

 

 

 

 

I have always said that the most important part of any relationship is for there to be honesty.

 

 

 

So, let's be honest.

 

 

 

 

__________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you ever found yourself at a crossroad in life and you weren't sure the road to take?

 

 

Or, just like in real life, you come to a sign that read, "DEAD END" and you're forced to turn around and find another route.

 

 

 

For the past couple months, I have found myself having a little bit of my own personal pity party  because my life is on a rather crazy detour. I had no idea construction was needed on the road me and my family were traveling on... but either a bridge was fixing to go out, a sink hole suddenly engulfed half of the highway, or there was too many pot holes for safe travel. Or all three.

 

 

 

Regardless, God sent us down the detour road.

 

 

 

 

I'm bad with change. I like consistency. That's why most of the friends I have, I've had for years and years. I make new friends often, and I don't just "drop" friends when I get bored or my life is too busy for them. I like to wake up around 6:30, drink my coffee, talk to God, shower and get pumped up to wrangle three rug rats for the next 15 hours. I like it when Grant takes me to get ice cream, or my sis in law, Morgan... me and her are the sweet toothers of the bunch. Did I just make up a word? I like it... Anywho, I like to get the same ole same ole. I like cheese pizza. I like club sandwiches. When I first come home, I throw some socks and sweats on... I wander if that is from all those years of watching Mr. Rogers.... any other 80's kids with me?

 

 

 

Okay, you catch my drift?

 

 

 

I like doing the same thing. I like knowing what is about to happen.

 

 

 

It's been extremely difficult to sit in the driver's seat and to be driving down a road that seems as though it should be in the Mojave Desert. For those of you reading this out of the U.S., that is the driest desert in North America.

 

 

I don't mean my life right now is lifeless, I just feel I've been placed in a position where I am a bit more alone and secluded than I ever have had to be.

 

 

 

Don't get me wrong, I am glad I am not in control, I am glad I am clueless right now, even.

 

 

 

 

I haven't been able to say that until today, actually.

 

 

 

I often like to vent through writing and somehow the Lord always uses my own words to turn around and encourage myself. I was thinking today about how our society always wants to have one up on each other.

 

 

If you say you slept awful last night, your friend has a reason they slept worse.

 

If you are sick with the flu, someone has had it way worse.

 

If you got a good deal on some shoes, someone has a story of when they got some for even cheaper!

 

Your kid knows sign language? Well, someone tells you that theirs knows three languages.

 

You saw 12 people saved during your church service? Your buddy says they saw 15.

 

You shot a big buck... oh man, don't get me started! I was raised by a hunter and now I'm married to one! Ha! Okay, I seriously plan to shoot a bigger buck than Grant this year ;) I'm kidding babe... kind of.

 

You have a 3.8 GPA? Your best friend boast they always have at least a 4.0.

 

You have 200 friends on Facebook? Someone says they have 700.

 

Then, as mothers, they compare every little thing! How many teeth are in their child's head, when they learned to walk, how long they labored and if they breastfed or made their own organic baby food. We need to encourage each other instead of make each other feel like failures, women! I have felt pressure at times to make Raylea behave and act perfect around people because of their standards. I had an older and wiser friend tell me to only discipline my kids for what we say is wrong, not what they think is wrong. Parenting is to be joyful and happy and exciting, not a time that you try to out do others in how well your kid behaves or the fancy clothes they wear or how young they were when they said the whole alphabet. Teach them kids how to be like Jesus, MEEK and HOLY and LOVE. Pretty much the opposite of today's society.

 

 

 

I learned whenever we miscarried a baby, nearly four years ago, that even in tragedy, people still somehow want to have one up on you. A loss is a loss is a loss. Just like losing your 40 year old son, it would be just as awful to lose your two year old boy. Miscarriages just tend to be something people are uncomfortable to talk about, I guess because nobody sees the stomach getting larger and you likely don't know the gender yet, and sometimes you haven't had the chance to announce your pregnancy, but coming from a mother who wanted that baby for 13 months, let me tell you, I will always mention and want to talk about my child. August Shalom. See you soon, little one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is something I have learned, and it is this.

 

 

Oddly enough, it was on the front of card my husband gave me last week.

 

 

 

 

It said,

 

 

 

Sometimes what looks like falling apart is actually everything falling into place.

 

 

 

 

 

So, yes, you may have come to a dead end. Maybe you just ended a relationship that you truly felt was going to finally lead to marriage. Or maybe you took a wrong turn and made a mistake and God is placing you back on the solid rock so your tires can easily spin down the road... or, maybe you're like me, you are down this detour road and it doesn't make any sense. You tried and tried to figure out what the problem was up ahead, why you had to go around it, but for whatever reason you are at a place of simply TRUSTING and LEANING on Jesus. Boy, what better place is there to be. You are safe from all harm on this road. What do you have to fear when God Himself has placed you down this road. It may seem dark, it may be raining hard and those wipers are going as fast as they can go, but there is peace in your soul that wouldn't be there if you were on that comfortable path.

 

 

I am learning to trust Him. I am learning to really lean on Jesus.

 

 

 

I encourage you today, to stop worrying, stop crying about who left, stop crying about who hurt you, stop crying about what happened. You raise your head up high and hold them shoulders back and put your seatbelt on because this is going to be the ride of your life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have a great trip.

 

 

 

I know I will.